Life Has A Crush On You

Falling in love with Life one day at a time…

Category: life coaching

Apprenticing Your Soul Work

As I sat in contemplation this evening, I was struck by a new-ish phenomenon – the seemingly rapid growth of the “coaching” industry. How cool is this! Life Coaches, Business Coaches, Career Coaches, Relationship Coaches, Writing Coaches – anything and everything – you can find someone to help. In my internal dialogue, I was wondering why – why now was there this push, this explosion? Why was it all of a sudden so accepted to hire someone to help you in any pursuit – most namely that which you have dreamed about since being a child?

The answer came quickly and clearly. We are at an exception time in history where culture has set up systems for us to be apprentices to our soul work. We accept, recognize and dare to pursue the call of our soul. So often, however, we have no idea where to start or how to get an organized, focused, and clear enough about what exactly our nebulous soul offering is.

Hence, you hire a coach.

Sometimes the money spent will be incentive enough to get clear and get busy. But often times we also need their direct, honest feedback. You need some sacred space to share the embryo of your dreams where they won’t crush it, but cradle it gently and firming while guiding you in how to continue to grow.  You can work with someone to refine your gift, your soul’s work and put it in a readable, understandable package and share it!

Coaching exists in such abundance now because the world is in need of more soul workers. We are actually at a place in the evolution of the planet, where we need to more quickly get to the purpose of our life. Our contribution to the world is needed beyond compare. Coaches help you get there.

So whether you are learning to love, learning to write, learning to market, learning to balance the demands of life there is a new army of teachers ready to help.

We all might feel the stigma of not wanting to ask for directions – especially when the journey is one of getting to your purpose, but let’s admit it – if you haven’t already achieved it, then you haven’t reached the destination. Why not stop and ask for help? Why not pick someone up for part of the journey who has taken that road before? Why not expedite your blossoming and contribution to us! We need you! You are part of the healing of lives and of the world. We all need teachers. We all need the enthusiastic, honest, demanding voice of a coach.

How blessed we are to live in a world that supports these coaches who pry from us the hidden words and dreams we struggle to even admit. They are teaching alchemy. They are healing the world.

 

Just take a step

I had the fortune of riding for an hour yesterday with a good friend and a professional counselor. It occurred to me a bit into the conversation I should ask her about a dilemma I had been facing. Nothing of major import, but a situation where if I didn’t move quickly then the opportunity would pass me by. Her advice was clear and rung true within me- just take a step.
You don’t have to know the whole picture right now. You don’t have to commit to a program or path and make a decision right now that defines your future. You just have to take one step in the direction.
She pointed out the fact that who knew what I’ll learn about myself or the world after I take that one step. It may open other options and paths I’m not even aware of. My job right now is not to know the whole picture, it to just take one step.
For the first time looking at this dilemma I have actually felt excited. Her advice opened me up to follow my bliss, not a program already designed that I have to prescribe to. It opened a world of possibilities I wasn’t even aware existed.
So I share this advice hoping it may open something up for you too. Is there something you just can’t figure out about moving forward? Great! Lift up just one foot. Take one step and explore yourself, your life and what you have to offer from there. While we are tremendously powerful forces of life we aren’t built or meant to have it all figured out before the journey. Where would the adventure be then?

What thought would I have to think right now to feel great?

This is the question that has been occupying my mind last night and this morning. Every time a sense of overwhelm creeps in I pause. “What thought would I have to think right now to feel great?” In an instant my perspective, my day, my body changes. I am focused and forced by the question to see my options of other thoughts and of other ways to feel.
I know questions can be one if he most powerful mood, emotion and life changers- but it’s rare for me to find one that works so universally. If this life is ours to create, the foundation, the blueprint starts with these questions.
Take some time right now while reading or next time you start to feel stressed, annoyed, even physically sick and ask yourself, what thought would I need to have right now to feel great? What do you hear? What thought are you led to?

Abundant living comes from recognizing, seeing, and embracing the abundance that is already ours. Any thought can be yours. Your wealth of thoughts abounds. Enjoy it!

I would like to offer deep thanks to Cheryl Richardson for bringing this question to me and to Louise Hay for bringing it to her. It has opened up a whole new world for me! I hope you enjoy it too!

Following your own blueprint at work

It is interesting moving into February and March. This weekend marks the beginning of a downhill slope for me of event after event. All I can think of when August finally does come is that I will have gotten at least 100 times better at all my jobs with all this practice!

But the question- the balance- lays in the approach. Will I derive a judgment of my work by the approval of others? Will success lay in the hands of my colleagues, bosses and general opinion? Or will I so dare to acknowledge the one true judgment, the one true standard, the one that lays within me?

It is an act of vulnerability to fearlessly pursue the tasks before you with your own personal blueprint for joy and unique expression. You are taking off the cloak of business, of stress, or being overburdened, which in some work environments can be measurements of your effort or even success at completing the job.

It is radical to find joy where others find stress. It is radical to trust when typically we try to control. It is radical to move from your heart not your head at your desk.

Like most radical things this new movement of yours will either die of its own accord- or change the world- your world- in deeply moving and profound ways to produce a life you were destined to live.

So yes, there is risk at working according to your own blueprint. But there in also lies the risk of never trying, the pain of conforming to a shape that isn’t yours, and a life spent worrying and stressing over the fickle opinions of others.

I hope as I begin this busy season of work that I remember my own orientation. That I make decisions aligned with the Divine that lives within me and that I remember this guidance is always available so I too can relax and enjoy this marvelous ride.

God Windows

It’s hard not to write about this when you come into contact with it again and again, day by day. It’s when you walk consciously into an answered prayer. I have been taught that no prayer is too small and here are some examples.

It has been raining all night and all morning. While I thought I was prepared, this morning I realized I didn’t have my umbrella. So I prepared the best I could with raincoats and trash bags and fully accepted the potential fate of being wet all morning from my walk and wait for the bus. I step outside all bundled to find not even a drop is falling. A God window opened.

On Tuesday I drove into Atlanta, a drive that usually makes me nervous especially around rush hour where hundreds of cars vie their way pass you. Yet, just as with every time I drive in a major congested interstate, I prayed on the ramp for a successful and safe merger. Each of the 4 times I entered one of the major highways it was as if there were no other cars for half a mile before me and half a mile behind me. Truly unbelievable that for a 6 lane highway- during rush hour- every time I merged, there were no cars even close. Like a mini- yet no less remarkable- crossing of the Red Sea, I found myself in another God window.

This is what I hope we can all remember today. Despite appearances. Despite known facts or preconceived and lived experiences, we can all ask and be grateful for these God windows. Little pockets meant just for us to live into and keep us safe.

Mind Candy

My morning tradition was disrupted today when I left my iPod in the car that Drew took to work. Somehow, on this rainy Wednesday, this seemed to be a good thing. It seemed to welcome in some space without words into my morning.

I realized that while I love and find it useful and powerful on so many levels to start my day by walking to the bus stop listening to a program, a speaker or something inspiring, it is powerful too to hear yourself some mornings.

Instead of trying to stuff down some programming, I decided to gently step out into programming myself. I was quick to realize that even the positive thoughts and affirmations I used to say, those that come naturally and almost immediately to mind when I think – ok, lets affirm- seem stale, or at least burdened with a twinge of disbelief from my heart.

That is the last thing I want – inauthentic words. Empty vessels trying to create something.

No. The entire power and purpose of affirming, of self-speak, is the emotional certainty you feel with the repetition and knowing of what you are saying.

So this morning I had to back track. I had to be completely honest with myself. When I said something and it didn’t feel “right”, then I lessened the degree. I turned back and let go a bit, and said something new.

It was as if my mind was in yoga. Just as when I enter into a pose, I find the edge – and while I think  “Oh, your growth will be if you push through and go beyond this limit”, my wise self says “Oh, ok, that is where the limit is. You see it; you found it, now back off a bit and breathe. The limit will dissolve by your working at this lesser place.”

It is interesting when you sit with your own mind – in walking meditation, or sitting meditation- without any other words. No voices guiding you. No songs luring you. Just you, being you.

So, while I started this morning with grandiose phrases – ones that I had used before – I ended up being at two simple ones. These were the ones that “clicked”. These felt right. So I stayed there. I dwelled in the rain saying to myself – out loud and quietly – “My job is fast, easy and fun. My job is fast, easy and fun. My job is fast, easy and fun.”

And eventually, it came – the soothing, quiet phrase that whispered to my soul and tasted so good I couldn’t leave it all morning – it was a gentle, “I love you, Elizabeth.” It was a true surrender of all the self-improvement talk – of all the let’s be the best – let’s do better- self-speak that I hadn’t even realized was crowding up my mind quite so much.

So today, this is my mind candy. This is the refreshing drink to my thirsty soul. This is the day, I turn everything else off – and I turn myself on – even if it’s a quiet, ever so gentle whisper. This is the day that I remember, that I really do deeply love myself, as much as, I love others.

For every dream of yours you have the tools…

A moment ago I read this from the blog of Paulo Coelho.

 

“Our dream, the desire that is in our soul, did not come out of nowhere.
Someone placed it there.
And that Someone, who is pure love and wants only our happiness, did so only because he also gave us the tools to realize our dreams and our desires.”

(The rest can be found on  http://paulocoelhoblog.com/2013/01/11/our-dream-2/)

My soul took a breath for a moment with this beautiful reminder. It seems that January has started in full force. The rest and break the holiday afforded has refreshed us and propelled us into many new endeavors on top of all the projects we were already doing. For me, I love it. There is something that is always comforting about the fact when I am doing a lot, and doing that which my soul has whispered for me to do for years. It makes me focus on the necessary, and when I focus on the necessary, then I sense the efficiency of nature coursing through me. I feel that I am being an instrument for good and joy in the world.

As Paulo Coelho reminds us, the ideas and dreams that we have come to us for a reason. They were planted in us, intentionally and with full purpose. And just like any good gardener, this Someone does not just let the seed have to fend for its own water and sunshine and nutrients. All that is needed for the dream to grow and fruit is provided – we already or will have the tools to accomplish our growth and soul’s work. While you have to do your part of allowing the essence and path of the seed take place, we are all given all that we need to accomplish what is being asked of us.

So often when we sense a calling, a dream, a desire of the soul, we hesitate. We think of all the other things that are urgent and necessary and that take up so much of our time. Yet the truth is that the easy fulfillment of this desire is before you. You have all the resources, all the tools, that you need to “hammer” it out. Your life, your experiences, the hidden tools you already possess will make themselves apparent and useful.

So what?

So don’t delay! There is no time like the present. There won’t be “more” time later. There will be the same crunch. The same hesitation. The same “overwhelm”.

Today, instead, lets change our focus. Let’s see the wealth of resources before us – even if it’s the five minutes we drive in the car alone that allow us to make a phone call, or the extra $100 that you can spend on doing that which you thought of doing years ago to spread a message you believe in. Perhaps its the fact that you have paper and a pen (resources that not many people have). Perhaps its a gift of music, or inspiration that you can offer someone. Perhaps its an excel spreadsheet where you can lay out a plan. While this spiritual truth of having all the tools needed to realize our dream is true of everyone, it is only bestowed on those who realize it. Pause. Breathe deeply. See the depth of resources before you and within you. And recognize how you and your life are perfectly aligned to the accomplishment of that which you think is “too good to be true”.

Unbreakable Joy

There are mornings when I awake that are filled with in breakable joy. I know I write about this often but it’s as if these thoughts and emotions fill me up so much to the brim of my being that they have to overflow. While they spill out in conversations and meetings and yoga or whatever I am doing, I can’t help but to feel even greater joy to let them spill onto the page.
Without effort, while still in bed everything reminded me if the Divine blessings my life is filled with today. My mattress was soft and the quilts on it warm. We were safe in our home all night. I was still satisfied from a delicious meal that was enjoyed with my family, a family that made sacrifices for each other and family that is all together, a family that celebrates and is healthy. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste! I have running water. There are so many clothes in my closet and we could literally choose whatever we wanted for breakfast. There were messages from loved ones on my phone and a dog to wake me out of bed. There was peace with my job and a joy that I have one and one I like. The man I love more than anything was singing in the kitchen. Thoughts and ideas of how I can contribute and contribute easily came to me and added to my excitement, an excitement that time and time again brings me to my knees in great awe.
So what could this mean for you? Really whatever you want it to. But I hope that with this spillage you realize that you too are invited to this unbreakable joy. That with every faucet you turn on, with every sip of clean water, with very heated room and every caring person, you are reminded of your status as elite, as blessed, as royalty of this world and life. This is a day filled with these and so many more miracles. I pray you feel as full from them as I do now and forever.

Watching the Waves

There are moments everyday of disappointment. Moments when we catch ourselves plummeting, when we sense loss and tighten up. We brace ourselves for the fall.
I know when these happen, sometimes in the tiniest of moments for me. Someone says something. I hear something from somewhere, I spin into reaction. I try to find a grip. Sometime I grab onto things that give me a false sense if control and steadiness- blaming others, anger, eating, jumping into unplanned action. But I know these are just temporary fixes. Band aids for a wound that might need some time to heal.
But I can sense I am on the right path since I know when these moments come where I loose my footing. I can feel my breath stop. I can feel a mood brewing in my blood, uninvited. I can see my hand reach to stuff down another emotion with something to occupy my mouth. I can see my true self shrink by enlarging the issue before me.
While there are many strategies out there to help us with those moments that surely come up daily my only cure right now is to watch the waves. I set a timer to literally create some space for me, some time where I a not allowed to do anything- talk, eat, even think. I can only breathe. Deeply. Audibly, visibly with my chest rising and falling. This is the secret ocean I carry around with me. Hidden, like an ancient secret cove, these are the waves that smooth the jagged edges of anything in its way. I get the same peace in this time as I do sitting by the shore. I get the same wonder on this edge as I do standing and searching for an ending that doesn’t exist on a vast ocean. And to think, it’s always there. I can choose to always live by the sea. I just have to turn around. I just have to pause to hear it crash on the shore, rhythmically reminding me there are things that came before and things that will outlast. I just have to breathe.

Intention and Resolution Questions for 2013

Ever since I began a daily spiritual devotion I have gained greater clarity with each passing day and year. It is comforting to come to New Year’s Day with a peaceful heart and the ability to articulate clearly what I desire to contribute and be in the coming year and years. My goals are attainable but make me stretch. My vision is exciting. My plan to accomplish these things is enjoyable! I hope that you too enter into this year with excitement, passion and clarity!
My affirmation for myself and you is that this coming year is the best yet! That 2013 is filled with deeper love, greater growth, more abundance and joy in every day!

While we all have ways to establish our intentions for the coming year, below is an outline of questions that were sent to me and that I have found useful and enjoyable at this turning of the year. I hope you do too. I toast to you!

1. What do I truly value?
*My primary goal is:
*I want to be _________ kind of person
*How do I want to feel each day?
*What do I want to experience in this life?
*Where does love fit in to this picture for me?

2. Personal Mission Statement
*What is my goal for my daily practice?
*Share that goal with someone else.

3. How can I express myself and my goals in my life?