Life Has A Crush On You

Falling in love with Life one day at a time…

Month: April, 2012

Transition Chocolate….

Part of my personal subscription for a happy life is chocolate. Not just because it tastes divine and feeds probably more my soul than my body, but because it is a special treat. I am not ashamed to say that I go months having a piece or something with chocolate in it every day. The only way this works though is when you don’t drench the treat in guilt. That always leaves a bad aftertaste.

Today I remembered the power of chocolate. After long Monday running around, I found myself complaining in the car to Drew! That’s not how I want to greet anyone! Nonetheless the person I love the most! But everything was completely turned around when I dashed into Earthfare to pick something up, and before leaving, snuck around to the bulk section and grabbed a few chocolate covered pretzels.

Walking out of the store, I took my first bite, and literally was transformed. It was like the chocolate put rose-colored glasses over my eyes! Everything looker happier and brighter. The deliciousness took me over. I couldn’t help but know in every cell of my body that  my life is remarkably amazing. Life really does love me. And today it told me through chocolate and sunshine, panting dogs, and green tea – even a good, long day of work.

Just a few steps later, I got back into the car and was changed. I was amazed at my own difference! I wanted to play not complain. I wanted to tickle not fight. God Bless chocolate covered pretzels!

Yet as I sat amazed at my own transformation, I realized that it wasn’t just the chocolate. That was just a symbol. It was my transition treat. It broke my work-day pattern, of the ream of my frustrations playing on repeat  in my head. Taste brought me out of it. Dashing and running into the store brought me out of it. Looking upon the car that I come out of objectively brought me out of it.

So what is the point? That we can all develop transitions to break ourselves out of negative patterns we find ourselves in! There are too many times that I can hear myself speaking and just don’t like what I am saying. But I don’t have a bridge. I don’t have something to shake me up and get me to another place.

So I thought today to share and brainstorm some of these “Shake Ups!” I hope that we can use them, do them, and apply them, so that we are never in a spiral of behavior that even we see is ugly! In my experience, the more we can involve our bodies and all of their senses, the more we can be brought out mentally of the rut.

Some I have tried:

– Shaking my whole body violently before getting into my car after work (This one is a favorite – It is like pressing a reset button, and I can never do it without laughing at how ridiculous I must look to others.)

– Splashing water on my face (Even from a water bottle in public)

– Delighting in Chocolate Covered Pretzels

– Running, even a short distance playfully (not like a “run) as if I was a child again.

– Doing a handstand

– Moaning/ groaning/ yelling (mostly in my car or in another place people can hear/ become concerned)

– Taking a walk in nature or a historical part of town

– Cooking!

– Sticking my tongue out as far as it can go and doing other crazy facial stretches

– Playing a new really good song loudly

– Brushing my teeth

– Playing the miracle game out loud

Theres a beginning list. My thought and experience though, is that we can each condition ourselves with one “transition” move that helps us to leave work behind, so then we can be present to all those around us, including Life. What’s one you can try today?

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Sunday Procrastination Help….

Yea its Sunday! Yet in this season, with finals, or projects, or maybe just the overwhelming desire to be and do everything outside, there comes a weight on us too – the weight of procrastination.

I am writing about this, because, whoa! am I guilty of it this weekend! There has been three things I have been putting, putting, putting off and this makes me feel terrible! (I eat poorly! I berate myself! and I dilly daddle! What is that about?)

Here is one trick though, that I just used that was AMAZING! It helped me focus and get “it” done. (And really wasn’t painful at all)

1. Think of the task that you have been putting off (for me it was making a scavenger hunt – don’t ask!)

2. Then think realistically how long will that take (I suggest never doing it more than 45 minutes – we all need a break! If the task you are thinking of will take longer than 45 min. then break the task up. Study for one section/one chapter. Do the first part of the task. This alone will help with not feeling overwhelmed, which is usually the culprit of the procrastination in the first place.)

3. Take you phone and set a timer for that time.

4. Then, Do It!  Give yourself full permission to completely stop when the timer is up, but not until then. 

Chances are the momentum of just starting will push you to want to complete it!

God bless timers!

Amen.

You look stunning!

Here is the idea! and the thinking behind it….

Sometimes in this journey and relationship with Life, we forget that it is there. We forget it is pining after us, showering us with compliments, supplying every need. It can be hard since Life is so funny and takes on any and every form around us, yet doesn’t have one distinct face.

So in an effort to help that, to support you, to charm you, to build you up, Life is going to start tweeting!

Like Life, we aren’t always sure when it will come, how often, or what it is going to say – but if you feel like you need a pick-me up, if you want to open another channel for Life to reach you and love you, you can have it @LifeCrush!

I am bubbly just with the idea! I have always wanted more positive, enhancing and brilliant messages, meant just for me! Now we can all get them!

Tweet! Tweet!

xo

Snake Bites

Drew learned from a well-known neurologist recently that memory is essentially undependable. For example, they were able to do a study where the day after 9/11 they asked hundreds of people to write down exactly where they were when they heard about the crash, along with other emotions and details about the day. One year later, the same people were asked the same questions about 9/11 and their experience. What happened? Only 10% were accurate!

I love that I heard this and thought, “oh yea, 90% didn’t accurately remember, but I sure do.” But then, as good of a friend as Life is, I could hear it laughing in the background- “When are you going to get it? As sure as you might be about a something that you experience, it may not have happened like that at all! You are not always the special 10%!”

It is so funny that I think like that so often! But the truth is that this could be a great thing that memories are not really what we remember them to be.

This understanding of memory and its unreliable nature is incredibly valuable to us.

If what we think has happen to us in the past in fact is more likely not to have happened that way or like we remember at all, then we are all given clean slates. Most of the junky thoughts about ourselves, our mistakes, our decisions, our affairs aren’t accurate! You are wrong! Let me repeat that – You are wrong!

In fact, the chances are that everything was actually tremendously better than you remember!

Wayne Dyer equates it to this  – experiences in our life are like snake bites. They happen. The snake injects something into us and it circulates. The bite stings. Yet you get to decide if it was a poisonous snake or not! Sure the bite itself hurts (pain is a sign that you are alive!), but it doesn’t have to kill you. A bite from a snake alone will never kill you. Only the venom will. In this metaphor-  it will be what you think about the bite afterward – it will be the meaning you associate with the event- that kills you, makes you sick, poisons your system.

This is wonderful news! The best news I have thought about in a while. But no knowledge and understanding  is powerless unless it is used. So how can we use this?

We could start with a little memory, some small hurt from our past, but why not make it fun – why not look at something that was the hardest thing you had to deal with. Something that left you feeling powerless, hurt or “damaged”.

Now, as you think of the memories, “facts” of the events, look at each and see that it is not “truth”. Look at it as it really is – the way you have processed and chosen to remember it! I insist that 90% of what you are remembering is a lie.

Now what? Now that we realize the last vestige of the event- our memory-  is wrong, what is left of it? Has it lost some weight? Are you able to look around the event for other things were going on then that you might not have noticed?

Since this happened in your past, you are coming at it from an excellent vantage point. You have survived! That alone proves that you are strong! What did this “bite” actually do for you? Did it make you prove your strength, perhaps to others, but most importantly to yourself? Did it jar you and knock you to the floor so you could get the pleasure and gratitude of feeling what it means to walk again? Did it turn you on to learn more about something in particular? Did it make you look deeper at yourself, a relationship, or the nature of Life?

This is the true power of Alchemy in Life. You have the ability to change the poison cursing through your veins into an IV of healthy fluid to propel you forward! You have the ability to choose how you remember something, how you process the pain.

What if there are absolutely no accidents at all in Life. What if everything is a gift placed exactly in the right spot for you. Gifts, even hidden in the grass in the shape of snakes – a thing that society has deemed as “bad”, “scary” or “threatening”. What if your snake bite is the best thing that happened to you, the most transformable event, the coolest story that you have!? What if we get out of our minds and see that we were just freaking out because we were bitten, but there is no lasting damage, no venom to deal with, except for the uproar and effect our mind had on it?

What if we could just pause and look at the bite, look at the story and say “cool, but you have no power, no threat, to me now”. And then turn to the only true thing in front of us, Life, and this present moment filled to the bring with all our abilities to act right now.

Awakening the Goddess Within

I don’t know if you have ever experienced this before, when someone gives you a compliment and it just doesn’t jive. You smile and say thanks, but something within you simply doesn’t click with what the person is saying. It isn’t that you don’t think of yourself that way, but rather that  the compliment points to the wrong aspect of you. It is like someone coming over for dinner compliments the meal by attributing great taste to the plate it is served on.  It just misses the mark entirely.

I have had this experience when my husband has called me “smokin’ hot”. Don’t get me wrong, I am very flattered, but I don’t think I ever laid in bed as a little girl hoping and wishing to be made “hot”, none the less, “smokin'”. I get it. There are times, truly, when he looks so good I can’t find the right word, and our culture and language limits me to “hot”, as well. But the truth is that he is devastatingly handsome at those times. He is irresistible. He is debonair. When I use those words, yes, I suddenly feel more accurate in describing what I am seeing and experiencing.

Well a few years ago Drew paid me a compliment that hit me to my core and blew my mind. It clicked like nothing had before. It resonated with something deep within me and struck a chord that pointed to a true nature that had lay dormant for my entire life.

He called me a Goddess.

I loved this so much. This may be because I yearn for the Divine Feminine to boldly embrace every living thing in this world.  Or perhaps because it reflects the highest compliment of Truth I believe anyone can have – a recognition of the Divinity that they are.

The Truth as I understand it is that without any doubt there is the Goddess energy and being living in every woman (and man, just not quite as much, since he has more of the Masculine Divinity). This Divinity moves sultry through the bedroom, She nourishes those who are hungry for Truth, and She expresses through tears, laughter, dancing, indescribable beauty. The Goddess is the one who dances with Life through sunsets and blazing fires. The Goddess looks straight into fears and the unknown and extends her rebel yell or delicate song to break the darkness and create a net of lights to travel along. The Goddess is the highest good and the one that recognizes there is no “right” or “wrong” but that it is all her lover, her teacher, her friend, her beloved Life.

This is why Drew calling me a Goddess gave me pause. He was acknowledging this higher self, this Being of light that our culture and religions have squelched or denied in its true feminine form. For me, it was the invitation somehow to be spiritual and in love in my own womanly ways.

It is unfortunate that Goddesses are relegated to the past, to ancient history and cultures looked upon historically and not spiritually. It is a shame because this world is overcome by millions of Goddesses, ready and excited to embrace Life, to create Life, to dance with Life. This Goddess lives in every woman. I was lucky enough to have my man point it out, but this then took me till my mid-twenties. What if we went and met the goddess within us sooner? What if She was welcomed to rule our mind and our actions? Where would she take us? Trespassing and skinny dipping in a neighbor’s pool under the full moons embrace? To a street corner where a man needs some food, and She offers him a meal and Her coat? To the freshly tilled soil hot under the noon-day sun pressed underneath Her bare feet?

How would your life be different if every morning you greeted this Divine aspect that dances around your altar before even you get out of bed?

How would your days play out if She played in them?

She is real. The Goddess lives within you and is you.  She is a force to be reckoned with, bowed down to and shaken awake. For Life has a policy of serving the Divinely Perfect Goddess when she is awakened within you, It brings Her nothing less than her Divine expectations in everything. Recognize this in yourself, or in the women around you, and nothing will ever be the same.

Smile Asana

I have the most wonderful, juiciest, fabulous secret to share with you today. While I have shared it with many yoga classes and some friends, I am bursting at the seems to have others try this, to see if for you too this brings about the miraculous!

Before I will tell you what the exercise is, let me explain the result.

When I first practiced this, and every time afterwards, I have been flooded with hidden memories of joyous things. I have laughed out loud in public (yes, often in yoga classes). I have been en-lightened – in the sense that weights and burdens were suddenly lifted. I have rejoiced and celebrated, instantaneously. I have felt deeply and genuinely happy and joyous.

What is the secret? In fact, it is something incredibly easy and accessible for all of us, at any time.

All it is, is a smile.

I call “smile asana” (“asana” meaning pose), since it is an intentional pose that we hold longer than we normally would in life. Just as some poses in yoga look simple, but are actually quite challenging, this can be deceptively hard. Yet in my humble beginnings as a yoga practitioner, I believe this pose is the sign of a true yogi/yogini.

The exercise here is to see if you can maintain a smile on your face for 10,20,30 minutes. Preferably, if you practice it while you are doing something active (yoga, running, cooking, walking), your practice and activity will be heightened. However, I believe it also works well during, and as, a mediation. Whatever it is you choose to do simultaneously, the greatest question is “can you do it with a smile – a long smile?”

The hardest part of this pose, for me, is certainly to remember to do it. How quickly different thoughts and other distractions come to steal my smile. But just like any meditation, I pause and recognize that I have stopped my practice and move back into the smile, without beating myself up too much (which is actually hard to do while you are smiling!).

If you do this, I can guarantee that you too will be flooded with happy emotions.

Our bodies can’t physically smile and not connect emotionally to past times when we have smiled. It is literally impossible to hold a smile and not get happy (for some it just may take a little bit longer).

This will probably eventually lead to a laugh, which is always highly encouraged and deeply healing!

Soon enough, as you will see, you will be communing with, appreciating, and dare I say, dating Life on a brand new level than before!

If there is one thing that you try today, tomorrow or the next day, it is this smile pose. You will discover that it truly is a hidden gate to the greatest treasures Life has to offer.

So go and set the timer, go to the class, put on your sneakers, and prepare to smile! Prepare to bubble up from the depths of your soul the happiest parts of your experiences by opening hidden door!

Like a Sock

I know we all fold laundry and end up with random one-sock articles. Where is the match? Did it get stuck in another load? Caught behind the dryer? Stuck still to the edge of the washing machine?

No matter how hard it may be to find this missing sock, the undeniable truth is that every sock that is new and enters into your life has a perfect match.

Unquestionably, though, these pairs separate for a bit, get lost in the jumble, and are alone.

It can be frustrating, it can be annoying, and even sometimes we give up on and forget the fact that every sock that entered your house has a match.

You are exactly like a sock. You came here, to this life, with a match. There is a perfect left to your right.

We can never forget this, even when like a new sock you were thrown into the washing machine of Life and separated before ever being paired together.

Keep knowing, without a shadow of doubt, your match is close by.

It just might take some more time for Life to surface your pair again.

But Life loves you, and it will bring forth soon enough, that perfect match that has seemed to go missing.

 

Dancing in the Rain

I had the privilege of hearing Dr. Wayne Dyer speak today. While there were many things that I enjoyed learning and hearing again, this was one that I hope to share.

He spoke of the fact that the storms in our life are important. Without storms mountains wouldn’t have the beautiful carvings and character that they do. Storms are a vital part of our life, and are especially essential for our growth and continued beauty.

The question is, though, do you run away from the storms when they come?

Or do you dance in the rain?

Happy Thoughts!

facebook

funny-looking dogs

eating in the grocery store

Friday!

filling in

finding a television show that is highly entertaining

the first time you eat outside in the Spring

the sound of ice hitting the bottom of a glass

preparing to meet your idol

a well-worn book, falling apart at the seams

spending less than $70 on your weekly groceries

a perfect present that has you romping through the house to find

using everything you have to create what you want

a vase of lavender

feeling understood

skipping

a really good laugh at yourself

a warm shower to usher you to bed

four ingredient delicious desserts

“cutting a check”

drive-thrus that give your dog a treat: the bank, chick-fil-a

a season of growth

being scared, but going forward anyway

waking up early naturally

committment

pillow talk

Enya

giving your “hidden world” as a gift to a love one

vines on trees so thick they look like cruise ship anchor lines

finding Narnia

breathing deeply in and out

Intention Coaster – Allowing Intentions to Seep into our Lives

Today, I thought I would share my intention coaster, and the idea behind it.  Above is an actual picture of my “coaster” that I created and used during a 6 day juice fast in December. Since then the coaster remains on my desk as a reminder of my deepest intentions.

“Coaster” is the wrong word though. Instead of going underneath my glass, I would put it on top (words facing the liquid) and let it sit for a few minutes, while I thought about what it said.

The idea is that the energy of the words seeps into the drink and you have an “intention-infused” food.

Sound kind of crazy. Sure. I can see that. But I also think it sounds kind of wonderful!

There is no harm in trying. If anything it is nice to think and remember of these intentions at a time when we commune with the Universe through eating and drinking. It helps me to be more mindful at a time when the thrill of food might get me a little distracted.

But there is some science around our thoughts and the effect they have around food and drinks, particularly water (which was a main component of all my juices). Dr. Masaru Emoto has conducted a rather famous study where he examined frozen water crystals under a microscope after doing certain things to the water. These included showing letters to water, showing pictures to water, playing music to water, and praying over water. He concluded, “The result was that we always observed beautiful crystals after giving good words, playing good music, and showing, playing, or offering pure prayer to water. On the other hand, we observed disfigured crystals in the opposite situation.” You can see a pictures of one of these crystals and read more about the  experiments at his website, http://www.masaru-emoto.net/english/ephoto.html .

Our thoughts and words really do affect things on a cellular level. What a cool idea to use this knowledge to add subtle, yet tremendously powerful enhancement to our life, even something as simple as our own water.

May your intentions seep not only into your drinks and food, but into all aspects of your life until you see then in tangible form all around you!